Pride


Pride is something we hear people say but seldom do we see it take such a form as I saw on Boxing Day 2016.
You see we all meet up at my mums on Boxing Day, it’s like an American supper where everyone brings some food. So there is know pressure on my mum to cook. It’s just a great family get-together. Now I know this is nothing special in it’s self. You would and everyone else would have done something like this. After all it is Christmas and this is what we do. 

It’s just this Boxing Day was planned for me, my brother and sister and our retrospective children. That’s it about twelve people thirteen if you include my mother. But this didn’t happen because we had the next generation of family turn up in force. And this was brilliant. There was nieces and nephews and they are all grown up too, so they brought there children. In the end I think I counted twenty two. Ranging from under one years old to over eighty years old. It was brilliant. Sadly some people couldn’t be with us but were missed greatly.  
Now when pride made an appearance was when my mother walked in to the room and every chair and table and cushion and spare square foot of floor had a body on it. And when she walked in every one of them faces turned and smiled. She said in a soft voice.
 ‘this is all because of me’ 
That’s it, that’s all. She said and some didn’t even hear her, but I did. And the expression on her face was of pride and disbelief at the shear accomplishment of making such a thing happen.  

I saw pride in her eyes, which In turn made me proud of her. 

I love you mum and thank you for making me possible. I really do owe you everything. 

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Public transport. 


This is the first time I have taken public transport in over 15 years. That’s apart from planes and the odd trip in another Country. I left the house and my wife( pictured above) asked me, “shall we get the bus to the train station?”

If you know me you would know that I will jump into my car at the first mention of a bus or a train. But my wife reassured me that the buses and trains of today are far better than what they used to be. So with the fact that I’m taking her out for the day I thought it only fare that I do as asked.

Nottingham is our destination today. Which is about twenty miles from where we live in Derby. Our city is nice but it’s small and sometimes you just feel like bigger.

My supprise is that I’m quite happy with the buses and train. With it being a fraction of the price of alternatives like taxi cabs and the ever increasing price of parking these days, public transport wins hands down on price.  Now comfort is not left behind ether. But it is where the car or taxi will win. But do you not think that an hour traveling on a well used seat is not to much to ask considering the money saved.

For me the winner is the train it was hassle free and let me write this so that’s a plus.

Moments of Importance 

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Some moments are ment to change us and some are meant to fade like a smoke ring carried on a passing breeze. Such moments like, the first look from a girl across the room. The first time a girl holds your hand. The first time you pluck up the nerve to kiss her on her lips, the clash of teeth and the acupaning realisation that you are not as good a kisser as you thought.  A true Constant in life is love. And if your lucky enough to find it and you hold on to it. Then happeness will follow.

Whatever love may be, I think its emotion, the rawest emotion of all, it fills our lives with Purpose. Without it memory’s will fade and dullness takes over. Just remember that in the end we don’t look up a picture of our best car or wish to see a statement of our closing balance.

We look into the eyes of a loved one and remember them moments of importance. Them moments that filled our life with love and smiles. Have a good day and I hope it’s full of such moments.

Photo from http://funny.pho.to

Is there such a thing as Writers Block? or have I just lost my way?

   
Its been a while since I have posted anything here or else where for that mater. And I’m thinking Why? Left with the question. Why have I stopped again? Could it be home pressures or work pressures? but I’m not sure that either are responsible.I do have a suspicion that I may need to move onto something new. I’ve been working on old works for so long now that I may not have wrote a new story for well over a year. The old is not very exciting anymore. They were once the best of me but now I see problems on every page.
I suppose the question I am really asking is do I battle on? Finish the old. Or do I start a fresh? Maybe write something new or write something I have never done before. The latter sounds exciting, while the former not so. But the old stories still have a hold on me because I don’t want to fail. In everything i have read about writing they say you should push through. But then I read other authors who say they have left a project for many years just to come back and finish it in a blaze of writing magic.

I do have to admit that I have been working shifts for the past three years and this has had an effect on my productive writing. When I started the shifts I thought that a night shift would be great for the creative process. Only this was the complete opposite for me. I seem to have gradually slowed down writing then eventually I stopped.

I have, as of last month left that job, hence Im writing my first blog post In many months. In hope this is the begining of many. 
Image from monica-graham.com

“I’m not a number, I have a name!”

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Thanks again to all the great blog readers of the world. I’m overwhelmed at the response you are giving this Blog. I appreciate all the follows, likes and comments, thanks guys.

Have you ever thought about this statement? “I’m not a number, I have a name” A name not a number, what’s the difference? A number is a designation. So what is a name if not a designation. I recently sat in a hospital waiting area with someone who means the world to me. I there in support of that person and I’m people watching. (we all do it you know.) I find as a writer I people watch all the time. You could call me nosey, I call myself interested in others. 
What I have observed today is even when people have been sitting in one chair for anything up-to two hours they still stand to attention when there name is called. There name is personal to them, it defines them to people that know them. It provides a designation to people that don’t. So weather your a number or a name, just remember you’re defined by you and the people who know and love you, not by what people call you.

Remember Enjoy! And Please, Please comment.

Arts? Do We Really Do Enough?

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Today I want to talk about the ARTS and how I think there almost the most important of all the curriculum. I don’t know about you but my interests stretch between writing, (very important to me) photography and music. (playing the guitar) All of these are from the arts. So you could say Im artistic or at least creative.

I went to a special school event where a number of schools had joined in a singing venture. Each school were taking a part to play in the production. It is probably obvious that one of my children was taking part. I have two children, both boys and both in school. When it comes to the arts i.e. Music, Paint, Dance, Writing, Singing, I’m not sure we get how important these subjects are in our schooling. Both my children have preformed in school plays and to be honest until today I thought they were brilliant in what they had done. Only with this joint venture there was a team of five who are covering the country spending what amounts to three hours with these schools, if I can be honest Blowing the current teaching out of the water. In just three hours these wonderful women have made these children into a pleasure to listen to. One year seven student sang like a professional she was fantastic.

 

Only it does lead to the question, should we not be doing this as an everyday thing? Shouldn’t our schools put as much resources into the Arts as they do the three R’s. I know its very important to be able to read and write and preform arithmetic. I also know that there are resources for the Arts already but and it’s a big BUT. If five teaches can transform many schools with only three hours tuition, shouldn’t we ask if were doing enough Now!

 

When I went to school the three R’s were everything. I began writing on a more serious level only seven years ago. Thats almost twenty years after I had left school. To be clear I’m writing from the UK and I know there are much better places in this world that prioritise the arts much more than us.  If anyone would like to comment on how good there schooling is then please do, I would love to have another countries comparison.

 

 

Remember Enjoy! And Please, Please comment.

Are you a Skilled person? or a Knowledgable person? or both?

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Knowledge and Skill, are two words that people use to describe others abilities. Although we all could be guilty of the synonymous use of these words. I feel we need to give them more thought. Because when we do we may find that they have very different meanings entirely.

The competence of a person can be assessed using these two words but have you ever looked into your knowledge or skill level. For instance can you tell someone everything there is to know about your field of work but you seldom put this into practice and when you do you seem clumsy and un-practiced. Well thats more knowledge and less skill working hand in hand. Or someone who can turn there hand to anything but has a hard time telling people how to do it. Thats skill but little knowledge. I believe I maybe the latter. Which believe it or not is the better of the two.

You see a man with little knowledge can increase his knowledge by reading and learning the required knowledge. Almost anyone can do this with enough time and effort. But an man with little skill may be able to increase his skills by practice but we all cannot be Leonardo Da Vinci or Mozart, and from the academic world there is Stephen Hawkings and Plato. These men were Knowledgable beyond most others. But to have reached this level they must have had skill in equal measure. For I’m sure there are men out there now with the understandings of the greats (the knowledge) but lack the skill level that is required to bring about true greatness.

So in short if you have knowledge then use that knowledge in practical applications and you will grow your skill to its fullest. But if your lucky enough to have Skill then acquire all the knowledge you can and you may be great one day.

In the end both Knowledge and Skill are required to master any field. My personal feeling is that its best to start with a bit of both. After all a skilful brain surgeon with little knowledge is a surgeon with a dead patient. Also an engineer with a lot of knowledge but little skill makes for machines that don’t last that long. (hmmmm is that why things just don’t last that long anymore.)

I hope you enjoyed this post. I know I’m not writing enough post and will try harder.

Please comment or just Like my post.

“The man who makes everything that leads to his happiness depend upon himself and not upon others, has adopted the very best plan for living happily. This is the man of moderation, the man of manly character and of wisdom.” – Plato

“I am the wisest man alive, for I know one thing, and that is that I know nothing.” – Plato

Good day or bad? How come it can change so fast?

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Nothing in life knocks me back more than, how fast a day can go from good to bad. You can be having the best days of your life and BANG right in the middle of your smile come a knock back that if you could script your own life you wouldn’t write It In, because it’s to unreal and people would think it fake.

I’m not one to moan or groan about life. I take life as it comes. Truly I do. No really I do. Ok I suppose I try to and some people may say that I can take things a little to far at times but I can assure you it all comes from the right place. And I never want to hurt anyone.
As you know I’m not a religious man but if I had to align myself to any one religion I think it would be of the Buddhist persuasion. A good quote from Buda is;

“Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.”
Buddha.

I like this one because happiness is a gift we can all give. And when we don’t take the opportunity to share such a gift its a waist. So less shouting and jealousy and more sharing of the cheapest thing in life a SMILE. Smiles in my experience give happiness for free.

Have a good day. Or what’s left of it. And remember to smile.

THE LOSS OF A LOVED ONE

Recently on the 17th of September my wife’s mother who has lived with us for the last four years passed away. Her name was Irene Wills, I called her “I” like in the way you would say eye and my children called her Nana. She was mum to my wife. We miss her but know she is in a better place free of the troubles that cancer brings. Incidentally the 17th of September is my birthday. My children say it’s just another way of remembering there nana.
And remembrance is where this post will take you. I wrote a post back on the 12th of May 2011, I titled it emotions part two. I wrote this just after my father passed away so it seemed fitting to repost it today. I think it applies very well. So please read on and as always feel free to leave a comment.

Emotions part two
POSTED ON MAY 12, 2011

Grief Can be the most destructive of the emotions; it’s more like a lucky dip, depending on what part of your life your in. When you are in your younger years it’s all about working out how to deal with such loss.
As children we all look at our parents and regard them as invincible. Mum and dad will be there forever. Then we have our first pet or relative pass away and the walls of safety are shuck.
Like all things experience makes for better control and composure. The more that pass away the better we deal with it.
Personally for me I sometimes feel I’m a bit to composed.

On the other end of the scale people who don’t except loss tend to have a hard time coming to terms with the person that has passed away. This can lead to all the bad emotions like anger and regret.

In the end it all comes to control, no one wants to have control took away from them. When we lose loved ones in my experience it’s when I felt at my most helpless.

There is nothing we can do to change this. No amount of wealth or power will bring that person back. In the end we all have to give in to the overwhelming power of death.
When we say that someone needs time to except the death, what we are really saying is we have to except that there is no mistake and no second chance and we are never going to see this person alive again.

How to deal with grief for me (and we all deal differently) it’s all about memory’s. We have this wonderful brain that holds everything we have ever seen, smelt, heard and touched. So take advantage and make what I call a memory box of the loved one who has pass away. Take any personal items you might have, place them in the box. Then in the years to come when you feel you might be losing there face or voice in your mind, take out the box and like a miracle it all comes flooding back. Sometimes with overwhelming results. But usually welcomed.
I have done this now more than once, each time I learn a bit more on how I deal with loss. The overwhelming lesson is that we should never be scared of our own memory’s. It’s this ability that sets us apart from all other life. We play things out in our minds so that we can learn and love from people who came before. To me this is a wonderful gift that we give when we die. My father was a great story teller and when he died I just searched in my mind to find all that he had told me. I now have enough material to last two life times. Thats mine and his, thanks dad.
This would not be if I shut of the memory’s.

To end this I will try and some it all up in one sentence.

It is simply to remember, and grief will become joy.